Tradition- TRADITION!

The title is meant to be sung in the style of the song "Tradition" from the Fiddler on the Roof, and for this last post of the year, I thought it would be nice to talk about some family and holiday traditions. And with any luck for those of you that know the song I am talking about, then hopefully it is stuck in your head now!

I started thinking about this earlier in the month, mostly because my new (this year) co-workers kept asking me about Canadian Christmas traditions. Really, it's the same in Canada as it is in the UK. It depends on what you call a tradition, but the same year-on-year happenings unfold in a comforting way.

Stores start decorating and merchandising in November.

December comes along and you can start to threaten your children with being on the Naughty or Nice list for Santa/ Father Christmas- In the UK, people tend more towards Father Christmas, but like Halloween, an Americanized Santa seems to be creeping in more and more every year. With this, some kids will write (or e-mail or text) Santa their list. Most families have Advent calendars with waxy chocolate... I can affirm the quality of Advent calendar chocolate is the same on both continents. 

December also brings magical bliss like glitter, flashing lights, sounds of bells, a new Starbucks holiday menu, the ever-more-worldly-and-popular-German-Christmas-Market, and old movies on TV from either the 70's or 90's. I'm not joking, films like Fiddler on the Roof, the Sound of Music, Home Alone, and Die Hard are on repeat here and there. You put these old classics on to get you in the mood whilst you decorate the house and the tree. And if not the films, then definitely some Christmas tunes: Feliz Navidad and the Little Drummer Boy off of a record (in a light blue sleeve?) bring me right back to my childhood. They are practically the soundtrack to decorating the tree with my sisters- all the homemade decorations on the bottom of the leaning real tree and the nice glass baubles on the top. Not to forget the fight to who gets to put the angel on the top of the tree.

Socialisation increases in December- Christmas parties at work are similar across the ocean: You have a meal together, there might be a dance depending on the size of your business. You generally get dressed up in something that isn't very comfortable and eat an attempt at a Christmas dinner that will never be as good as it is on the actual day. I remember going to my Grandpa's work Christmas party when I was young: three things I remember in particular: 1) having to wear the itchiest white lace tights; 2) riding the train around the campus; and 3) playing the fishing game to win a present. Itchy tights aside (which have turned into shoes that "aren't-made-for-walking" let alone dancing), I remember really looking forward to it, regardless of how naff a Christmas party always is. You might also visit family and friends you haven't seen since someone's birthday or else Christmas the previous year- Aunties and Uncles and "Aunties" and "Uncles".

The shopping frenzy of what to buy your Aunties and Uncles and "Aunties" and "Uncles" and friends and "friends" is the same. Weirdly, Leanna- the most disorganised sister, is the most organised and prepared Christmas shopper. And I remember sitting with my Mom learning how to wrap presents (I am the better sister at wrapping)- how to tuck the corners in and how to wrap gift-baskets.

The baking and food preparing frenzy also begins sometime after the 20th. Shopping for the big day purchasing cheeses, crackers, pates, and nibbles that are a treat. Also baking more and more cookies, and pies, and cakes, and all the calorific goodness that is associated with comfort over the holidays. On the note of food, don't forget to leave your cookies and milk (and Whiskey) for Santa + food for the reindeer (carrots or oats) regardless if you are in Canada or the UK.

It surmounts to the big day(s) where you gather as a family, and maybe even an extended family, have a big meal together, and exchange gifts. Who you visit and when depends on the number of families you have to accommodate and their traditions. It was easy for us as kids with the Polish half of the family celebrating on the 24th and the Canadian half on the 25th. Most in the UK do the 25th and into the 26th. In all cases, the feast is so similar with a large meat or two (turkey+cranberry and ham are the most common), stuffing, steamed vegetables, supds often in more than one form, and various desserts/puddings. Brussel sprouts, trifle, and fruitcake/Christmas pud are UK staples- three items that I happily trade out for my Mom's marinated vegetable salad and my Grandma's chiffon pumpkin pie any day! You chat, you banter, you drink, and then you exchange presents: I must say I haven't had socks or a calendar for the past three years and they have been missed! You chat a bit more, you put on your new clothes, you drink a lot more, and then it's time for it all to end. 

You pack up your new belongings and go home. You recover for a day, you make another indulgent visit and you cycle this until New Years where you have one last boozey feast of the year. You pack up your decorations (this time to the new CD you got, not at all festive) and you pack up the socks/sweater/jumper until the next December when you visit your family and "family" and friends and "friends" again. And you spend the next few months recovering and getting into the swing of all that will be good in the New Year- which for many of us is a comforting repeat of the last.

Happy New Year to all my family and friends and "family" and "friends" around the world. All the best and keep in touch!

Cultural Differences

The inspiration for this entry came the other day whilst at T1 at Heathrow en route en business and in need of a book to read. I hit the bookshop and found- 102 English Things To Do- Perfect! A (non)-fictional, list-type book that I can work my way through and blog about for the next year of UK Adventures. And apart from already passing (with a grade of 19/20) the Life in the UK test a year ago, I can follow this guide in pursuit of Citizenship (sometime) in the near-ish future.

Now, to find a place to sit down and read it: Caviar and Champagne bar- vrais Français; Giraffe- a typical American restaurant with quesadillas, burgers, etc., Est- an “Italian” Pizza/Pasta chain, and a little pub boasting "Great English Food"- why not start my 102 English Things To Do with an English meal. Fish and Chips (thing to do #95), Pie and Mash (#96)... Ummm… no vegetables other than potatoes on the menu brings me to standing there contemplating the awful stodginess of English cuisine. This equates to me participating unknowingly at the time in item #2 of English Things To Do= Dwelling on England’s Failures (where the author mentions that it is English to consider English Cuisine as a failure “despite the fact that in the last couple of decades English food has undergone something of a renaissance.”). I find the word “renaissance” an odd choice of words (the connotation is French and alludes to great change). It is quite ironic (don't judge yet and keep reading...)  that the author chose this word where “English” food hasn’t really changed nor can anyone really say what truly English food is apart from Pie and Mash and Fish and Chips. But, in the book you are to learn that the author is doing English Thing To Do #6- Be Ironic- “saying one thing and mean another”. Hmph. I settle on the Pizza/Pasta place where I know I can get a warm salad.

In this cultural pursuit, I ended up sat down next to a typically overweight American Dad (checked lumberjack shirt, jeans above his belly button, and a moustache that was not only for Movember) and Daughter combination eating the plainest cheese pizza (as a starter I found out shortly after sitting down and starting this entry) and a margharita pizza for the main and was time warped about 11 years listening to their conversation. 

“tell me what’s going on then? I’m not going to pass judgement, but I want to understand what’s going on”.

“meh”.
“can you tell me what’s working, what’s not working?”
“dunno”
“help me to understand you”
“I hate sharing”
“well, can you tell me what you don’t like about it- that should be easy?”
“I don’ wanna talk about it.”
Then about 20 minutes of conversation…and by conversation I mean Dad prodding and teenage Daughter meh-ing.

Then:
“one more question, can I ask you one more question?”
“meh”
“are you sure or are you leaning in a direction. Because before we set out on this trip, I thought you were clear on what you wanted. But it seems that you are more unsure now. Can you tell me why?”
“no”
“Come on”
“no, I don’t want to share”
"Is it based on facts or feeling"
"Dunno"
"Can you give me some direction?"
"No"
"What is it then?"
"I’ll give you a hint; I take into account more than just the education."- wow, she must be annoyed because she strung together more than three words.
"What, you didn’t see any boys?"

… more digging from Dad, more not sharing from Daughter. It brought me back about however many years because it was similar to how we worked (parents prodding, teens evading) and it’s only in my adult life that I can now appreciate how much of a pain it must be to have teenagers. Your parents want the best for you and want to find out how they can help you, but you as a teenager are entirely inconsolable and uncommunicative. And I know this is probably not a cultural difference, but it’s made me happy in my heart as an I’m-now-older-and-wiser difference.

Entirely culturally warped this time, the next phrase did come out of the American’s mouth: “the suckiest thing ab-OWT it was…”- In the words of my Uncle Rick- Holy Moly! I haven’t heard that since the last time I watched Full House! Other words like Cool and BAY-sil, not BAH-zel are things that I like about being North American- I will not conform to the English language with my pronunciation. I will conform, however, in the upcoming months by following the 102 English Things To Do to the best of my ability- purely for blogging reasons (and because it’s probably cute and quintessentially English to politely follow the crowd or else apologise for not doing so- #13/#14).

I will finish off with my cultural observations when awaiting my gasp- late Lufthansa flight to Hamburg- yes, there were audible gasps of disgust from the gathered passengers upon the late announcement.

Standing in a mass, not a queue or line-up among the smartly dressed and overtly annoyed Germans, here is a description of the general dress sense of my fellow passengers, and I do so because it is most unlike the dress sense of a crowd of English or Canadians or Americans waiting for their planes: 

 Example of Irish dress (non)-sense.

Men with neatly styled coifs- their hair is a length where it is styled and cut with scissors, not shears, yet not too long for it to look a-wry. They wear collars, and sweaters, and perfectly placed scarves under their tailored jackets on top of jeans that are not so tight that you can see what underpants they are wearing, nor are they so loose that you cannot tell what size they might be; with leather shoes and black or coloured socks. The women with a-line skirts and tall leather boots- polished; dark tights; also collared shirts, with sweaters, and elegantly printed scarves in a trendy mass around their necks; hair loosely, but not messily pulled into braids or twists. They are all tall or seem tall because they stand straight. And this is the mass that is German (or Dutch) and never English. They are conservative in their overt language and look forward to the Wurstsalat that they serve on the plane. I like this. (not the Wurstsalat).